


I'll deal with it tomorrow

by TotallyAddictedToYaoi



Category: Sekai-ichi Hatsukoi
Genre: Fluff, Laying in bed at night and just thinking about stuff, M/M, One Shot
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-03-25
Updated: 2015-03-25
Packaged: 2018-03-19 14:27:58
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 545
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3613383
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TotallyAddictedToYaoi/pseuds/TotallyAddictedToYaoi
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A one-shot from Kisa's point of view about Yukina and their relationship.</p>
            </blockquote>





	I'll deal with it tomorrow

'I just love his face.'

Kisa tried to convince himself.

'Just his face just his face just his face'

It was late one night and they were cuddling in bed in Yukina's apartment.

'His face his face'

Yukina was fast asleep with Kisa facing away from him, his back pressed firmly against Yukina's chest. The solidarity of his body and his warmth seeping through Kisa's skin leaving him feeling comfortable and at home in his arms.

'His face and his body. Not his personality. Not him. His face. I love his face. Nothing more. Nothing more.'

This happened regularly. Kisa staying up and thinking about it late at night. This was all so confusing to him. He had never felt like this before and it stressed him out.

'Right?'

It was just his face right? Now he was having doubts. He should be having doubts. It wasn't just his face and he knew it. Deep down he knew it. But the unknown is just so scary sometimes.

'What does it mean? What does this mean?'

He wasn't ashamed of admitting to himself that he was scared. He would never admit it out loud but on these late nights when he stayed awake and thought about it... as he slipped deeper into the twisted corners of his own mind he would confess. Because he knew better than to lie.

'I don't know'

And it was the truth. He hated not knowing as much as anyone else. And he desperately wanted to share his findings with someone, anyone. But who did he have? No one. The only thing he was good for was pushing people away. He'd cried about it many times before he had to realize it was no ones fault but his own.

'I hate this'

He snuggled back closer into Yukina's chest and Yukina made a soft noise if appreciation before squeezing him tighter.

'No I don't'

It was the truth. This. Right here. He didn't hate it. Couldn't hate it if he wanted to.

'I want to hate it'

Even with all of the scary twists and turns he found himself wanting more instead of less. More love, more affection, more time together, more of that face, even... More of the person behind that face. More of all of it.

'No I don't'

But more was something he had never wanted before. More of him was something he was used too. Something that delighted him at first but he was quick to get bored of. He may have only liked Yukina's face at first but... then when he got to know more about him... he found himself wanting more of Yukina as well.

"Yukina calls it destiny, fate'

He snorted quietly and Yukina squeezed him softly again and whispered in a sleepy voice "Shouta"

"..."

Kisa froze, he stopped thinking other than an 'oh fuck' and Yukina brought lips close to Kisa's ear. "Stop stressing. Go to sleep"

Kisa relaxed and finally allowed himself to feel the sleep deprived exhaustion. His eyes fluttered closed and he smiled to himself.

'I'll deal with this tomorrow'

The confusion, the questions, the answers, what it meant, what it means, what it will change, how to fix it, how to live with it... He'll deal with it tomorrow.


End file.
